The NeoCons had this idea that Iraq was like Utah and all it needed was to put Donnie and Marie in the gvernors mansion.
In fact that area was nothing like they thought. None of the assumed cultural, govt, military and private institutions. And those that were there were very old and weak.
Funny, adding bombs to a strange foreign area did not improve the place and turn it into a democratic wonderland.
So it's not a case of losing, we were never even remotely motivated or in the running for gaining the place.
What we've won, at the cost of many lives and a trillion dollars, is maybe the realization we don't know everything and it's unwise to use our military to overthrow a messy situation and then do less than nothing to clear up what hasnt resolved itself in 1500 years.
Same thng in Afghanistan-- we know nothing about the place-- geographically it's not a country but many little valley kingdoms. Driving the bad guys out of a few towns does not magically build a country.
Our ignorance is only exceeded by our stubbornness and greed. There may have been a few good intentions in the mix too but that does not help much in the end.